"You talk about being too much, taking up too much space...but if you had to be less, or take up less space than you do...then you're reducing yourself in order to make yourself fit." I remember when I started wearing my father's cowboy boots. They have a metal heel and are louder than stilettos on… Continue reading Taking Up Space
Category: Blog
Write Terribly
Force the words together, even if they don't fit. Be inelegant. Elegance is overrated; I want the grit of words that jar abrasively against the sounds of one another. Sandpaper on chalkboard. Metal on concrete. Maybe you don't share them, but I hope you do. Document after document of ill-fit language, a halfway decent phrase… Continue reading Write Terribly
Musings on Sexpectations
I never realized I had queer sex because I didn’t realize, for a long time, that there was another way to have sex. I grew up in a lesbian household, and my understanding of sex was shaped in that context. In middle and high school, as people’s sexualities (mine own included) began to develop, I… Continue reading Musings on Sexpectations
If This Were Chess, Would We Ever Reach Checkmate?
I get on these music kicks sometimes. It’s usually some ridiculous pop-esque song that’s annoyingly catchy and not really representative of how I live my life, but tangentially hits on something that resonates deeply within me. Past incarnations of this have included The Killers, “When You Were Young,” (we’re burning down the highway skyline on… Continue reading If This Were Chess, Would We Ever Reach Checkmate?
A Proof, Of Sorts
“Y’all should write a book,” he says. I laugh. “In five or ten years, maybe.” In mathematics, we have equivalency theorems, a series of statements that make the same basic claim in different ways. Depending on what you’re trying to prove, one statement might be more useful than another, and so we all spend the… Continue reading A Proof, Of Sorts
Contradiction and Movement
In an interesting and unusual dialogue between myself and @WhyTrustTomHanks, I find myself musing- both in the sense of contemplating and in the sense of deriving inspiration from- the direct and indirect responses to one another’s externalizations of internal processes. And this morning, I cannot help rereading his latest piece and thinking about performance and contradiction, about… Continue reading Contradiction and Movement
Intention and Action: Switch Musings
One of the main questions people ask in pre-negotiating conversations (that point when you realize you want to play with someone, but aren’t sure if you have any overlapping interests) is, “What are you into?” It’s a valid question. A necessary one, even. I just don’t have a good answer to it. The problem is,… Continue reading Intention and Action: Switch Musings
Possession
A breath. Inhale. The expansion of stardust in my lungs, the galaxies of oxygen swirling around like wisps of air and hurricane gusts, invisible, pervasive. Mind analytical, focused, examining, wondering, coiled tight and begging for release. Slow. What lives watches, and waits, in anticipation, consideration. The eyes from everywhere and nowhere; we are a part… Continue reading Possession
By the Way, I Love you
Oh, and by the way, I love you. Let's get married. We can break up tomorrow, because these words don't mean what we were taught they mean so we can redefine them to our liking and laugh at the lack of comprehension. Let's fuck, the friends-with-benefits way, the no-strings attached way that means that we… Continue reading By the Way, I Love you
Glow-in-the-fucking-dark Stars
Content warning: trauma, triggers, sexual assault My biological mother and I do not get along for a variety of reasons. We do best when we talk every couple of months and see each other once a year. She wants more, I want less. It’s a compromise. I knew she was going to be coming through… Continue reading Glow-in-the-fucking-dark Stars
Monomaniacism 