Musing wine thoughts: pain, power, and sex are intrinsically linked for me. I can take much more pain where there is a power component, and I can take much more of both when there is a sexual component. Not all my kink is sexual. But I think I haven’t wanted to touch pain and power… Continue reading Pain, Power, and Sex
Category: Power, Pain, and D/s
You Know Me
Find the pieces of me that make me the most of who I am and gently shred them. The places I hold closest to my heart and lay them bare. Spread wide. Slip your fingers into the warm velvet of my vulnerability, the slick crevices of my mind where I hide parts of my heart… Continue reading You Know Me
Submission and Suffering With Intention
Tonight, I decided it’d be a great night to put in a butt plug and do some writing. I’ve had a myriad of thoughts that I wanted to put down, and I haven’t worn my plug in awhile, and I drank a cup of cold brew, so why not? So I hopped in the shower… Continue reading Submission and Suffering With Intention
Countdown
CN: needles “We’ll do it on three, on the exhale,” he says. I nod, trembling. I want to say I never wanted this, but the truth is that I never wanted to want this. Bottoming for needleplay has been a hard limit for as long as I can remember, but hard limits born from fear… Continue reading Countdown
I Have to Choose
I’ve been in this strange place recently, grappling with desires that don’t usually exist in the forefront of my mind. Submission, in some form. Power. Pain. I’ve written about them from every angle I can imagine, deconstructed them a million and one different ways, followed my nice, logical thought process through to whatever conclusions and… Continue reading I Have to Choose
Tell Me
I want you to tell me. I don’t know who you are, or if you’re even real. If you exist, somewhere, in the world, in my world. I don’t care. I want you to tell me. Tell me it’s time. After hours of waiting and surges of wanting, its time. I can touch myself, but… Continue reading Tell Me
Need
My body is craving sensation. Pain. I’m trying to remember the last time my body needed to ground down into pain. It’s not a bad feeling, exactly. It’s just disorienting. Like my skin doesn’t fit right and I need to writhe around inside of it. Like I need something that forces me to push against… Continue reading Need
24/7 Switch
Why is this so much harder than I was expecting? I wonder, over and over, until it hits me: without meaning to, without intending to, without really consciously trying to, I accidentally wound up in a 24/7 switch dynamic. Let me back up. We talk about total power exchange, 24/7 D/s and M/s dynamics. Those seem,… Continue reading 24/7 Switch
Subjective/Objective Identities
‘Tis the season of change, the time we set aside to examine (and re-examine) our lives, who we are, what we want for ourselves. And in the midst of this season of new year’s resolutions and heavy introspection (what else are you gonna do when it’s so cold the air hurts?), I can’t stop thinking… Continue reading Subjective/Objective Identities
Write Me a Story
“Write me a story,” he says. “Something you haven’t written before. Something hard, something that makes your stomach churn and sink at the thought of hitting ‘send.’ Write something honest, something hard, something real. Write something for me.” For him. Laying in the bed, sheets tangled and twisted around my legs, the light tinting my… Continue reading Write Me a Story
Monomaniacism 