I have failed you, friend (and in that one sentence, hold the complexities of the interpersonal convergence of accountability; most notably, we have no agreements for me to fail and yet.) And yet. If we do not name these things, the weaves and threads that tangle ever moreso, does that somehow make them less real? Less… Continue reading Flimsy
Category: Creative Non-Fiction
Dampened
I’m sorry, love. I lost the words, trapped them deep beneath a stone shelter I forgot I built when first I felt the rumbles echoing beneath my feet. Here demons roam, saying too little and too much and not enough of the right anything and so I silenced them by burying them deep inside the… Continue reading Dampened
This One Is For Me
This one is for me. Not for elegance and eloquence, but for something else. The rougher edges and hollowed cores of pieces of me I left by the wayside. For years of stories lurking just beneath the surface. Scribbled fragments on the backs of serving paper and greasy placemats. She says, over and over. There… Continue reading This One Is For Me
Yes
“I love you, too,” she said, because she speaks the language of my eyes and I sink into the words like a blanket of moss beneath my hands. Soft. Certain. Steady. It might have been the first time, or the fiftieth, or that time where we have lost track of the number of times we… Continue reading Yes
What Leaks Out of Your Eyes
“How does it feel, watching them?” he asked, studying my face intently. She is poetry; he is sensation. She looks strong, a strength I knew she carried but hadn't seen in this same way. She never looks weak, but here, he brings out something different in her, and I can't help watching, seeing her out… Continue reading What Leaks Out of Your Eyes
Flying with Fire
I wasn't sure I would ever find the words. Maybe I haven't yet. Maybe that is the point, the culmination of the feeling of tilting forward, edging toward the event horizon. There are no words for the sense of inversion, a dark pull turned inside out to expel the stars that have lived inside for… Continue reading Flying with Fire
The Rest of Heaven was Blue
My brain is a fritzball made of static electricity and cotton balls. The world is built of molasses and wet blankets. Burn everything but the wood is damp. You will be lightning and cotton candy again soon. The world maintains its pace, you are feeling inertia. The sky is terrible. I have never loved you… Continue reading The Rest of Heaven was Blue
String Theory and Stardust
Cowritten in collaboration with Melissa Fate is nothing if not unpredictable. Chaos is the stable ground beneath your feet. I don’t know what I expected. We coexisted in two-dimensional space, across miles in words with no depth or volume, living the memories of other people’s stories. But we exist in a three-dimensional world. Even those… Continue reading String Theory and Stardust
Write Everything
Write about the wolf, about your colors shifting, about demons and demigods and the other strange things that are more common in your life than you want to admit. Write about shifting, and shapeshifting, and feeling the stirring behind your eyes that people see but rarely recognize, something feral, something free, something unbound to skin… Continue reading Write Everything
Ceramic Moments
CW: references to addiction and drug use Leaning up against the car, the damp scent of new dawn permeating the air. I close my eyes, grasping a cup of coffee and remembering mornings in gas station parking lots, the condensation of my breath mixed with smoke, the shape of a styrofoam cup, the scent of… Continue reading Ceramic Moments
Monomaniacism 