Blog, Kink, Queerness

Out Of Context

I've been struggling with context lately, although I haven't had those words, exactly. I keep having these moments of panic, and trying to explain why, and people around me being very perplexed because the thing that I’m panicking about is, apparently, a normal thing. I realize that, in the context of my life, certain experiences… Continue reading Out Of Context

Blog, Kink, Non-Monogamy, Queerness

On Fluid Bonding

My partner and I recently changed our safer sex/barrier practices which, of course, brings up the conversation of fluid bonding and what that means in the context of our relationship. It's been a conversation flitting around the periphery of my experience lately because I've been sleeping with (and having more conversations with) people who are… Continue reading On Fluid Bonding

Blog, Kink, Queerness

When Your Greatest Strengths Become Your Biggest Crutch

Someday, I will write out the full story of the past six months because, while it has been told in bits and pieces, there is still so much I held so close to my chest. It’s an old defense mechanism, a tactic to keep from getting hurt when everything inevitably falls apart (because everything does;… Continue reading When Your Greatest Strengths Become Your Biggest Crutch

Blog, Kink, Non-Monogamy, Queerness

I Am Not Your Partner

This isn't really a response to any one person or situation, but rather a collection of discussions I've had over the last few weeks. It feels worth it to talk about publicly because it's something that is increasingly important to me, and it has come up with various people in different situations. The short version:… Continue reading I Am Not Your Partner

Blog, Kink, Mental Health, Psychological & CNC, Queerness

Lessons Learned

This is going to be long, and mostly exists for me to bookmark something important for myself, but perhaps there are kernels in here for others as well. I’m exhausted, but if I don’t write this now, I’m afraid I will lose this feeling and with it, the opportunity to capture pieces of this into… Continue reading Lessons Learned

Blog, Queerness

Don’t Tell Me You’re Queer

Show me. Show me in the way you move through the world, in the way that you think and act and respond and live. Queer is a multidimensional concept. Queer isn't just who you fuck, but how. Queer isn't just to whom you show affection, but when and why. Queer is sensory; it has form… Continue reading Don’t Tell Me You’re Queer

Blog, Kink, Queerness

Action Vs. Identity: A Response

This morning, I read a piece by another author and it sat really strangely with me for a while. With her consent to link and respond, I wanted to talk a bit about what it brought up for me and my own thoughts on it. Before I begin, please let me say: I do not intend… Continue reading Action Vs. Identity: A Response