CW: references to CNC edging on rape play, references to substance use Every thought that passes through is violent. Slammed into the wall so hard my head spins and I can taste the fury, your hands uncontained and wild, roving like someone losing the edge of control, the line between want and need nonexistent as… Continue reading Every Thought is Violent
Category: Psychological & CNC
Lessons Learned
This is going to be long, and mostly exists for me to bookmark something important for myself, but perhaps there are kernels in here for others as well. I’m exhausted, but if I don’t write this now, I’m afraid I will lose this feeling and with it, the opportunity to capture pieces of this into… Continue reading Lessons Learned
I Can’t Tell You How To Terrify Me
CW: edgeplay and CNC discussion It drives me nuts that I have a hard time writing about CNC and certain kinds of edgeplay. I wrote Edging Edgeplay not too long ago, but I really have a hard time writing- particularly erotica- about these things. It's frustrating. Probably the closest thing I have to a singular kink is psychological masochism… Continue reading I Can’t Tell You How To Terrify Me
Edging Edgeplay
CW: discussion/reference to con-noncon-ish stuff Sometimes, I like to play with fucked up things. Only, they don’t really feel fucked up. They’re just… what my brain does. What my brain has done for as long as I can remember having fantasies. Coming into my room at night, coercion, seduction, “you’d do this if you really loved me,”… Continue reading Edging Edgeplay
Bandaging the Invisible Wounds
As a child, I used to love Sailor Moon. My friends and I would go outside and pretend to be different characters, defeating villains, mentally transforming into hyper-sexualized teenage schoolgirls as we roamed the playground, playing Sailor Moon. One day, I was headed out the door and told my mother (as I had done many… Continue reading Bandaging the Invisible Wounds
Monomaniacism 